Desperate to be a man, I feel hatred (9)
I believe the answer is:
abominate
'feel hatred' is the definition.
'desperate to be a man i' is the wordplay.
'desperate' is an anagram indicator (I've seen this in other clues).
'to'+'be'+'a'+'man'+'i'='tobeamani'
'tobeamani' is an anagram of 'ABOMINATE'.
(Other definitions for abominate that I've seen before include "Loathe, detest" , "Be revolted by" , "Amoeba nit - easy to loathe" , "Hate" , "Condemn" .)