Grey, but still able to have a fling? (4)
I believe the answer is:
ashy
'grey' is the definition.
(similar in meaning)
'a fling?' is the wordplay.
'fling?' becomes 'shy' (shy can mean to throw).
'a'+'shy'='ASHY'
'but still able to have' is the link.
I am not very happy about this link. Some or all of it may belong to another bit of the clue.
Can you help me to learn more?
(Other definitions for ashy that I've seen before include "pale greyish colour" , "Deathly pale" , "Like burnt wood or coal" , "Like, eg, volcanic dust" , "What could tray be" .)