Knowing it’s deliberate (9)
I believe the answer is:
conscious
I believe this is a double definition.
'knowing' is the first definition.
(thesaurus)
'deliberate' is the second definition.
(I've seen this before)
'it's' is the link.
(Other definitions for conscious that I've seen before include "Having awareness, knowing" , "Deliberate, intentional" , "Aware of surroundings, sensations and thoughts" , "Having awareness of surroundings" , "Aware, of one's surroundings" .)