My being after her makes practically no difference! (3)
I believe the answer is:
mum
'difference' is the definition.
The answer and definition can be both human attributes as well as being singular nouns.
Perhaps you can see an association between them that I don't see?
I don't understand the rest of the clue.
Can you help me to learn more?
(Other definitions for mum that I've seen before include "Keep quiet, mother" , "Mother (colloq.)" , "Keep it secret from mother?" , "Parent - shtoom" , "Silence" .)