Crossword Genius

Rarefied courtesies renounced by you and me, rebelliously (8)

Ross

I believe the answer is:

esoteric

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'rarefied' is the definition.
(I've seen this in another clue)

I don't understand how the rest of the clue works.

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(Other definitions for esoteric that I've seen before include "I set core up to be mysterious" , "not generally understood" , "Hard to understand" , "Intelligible only with special knowledge" , "Secret, mysterious" .)

I've seen this clue in The Irish Times.
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