Refined male character that’s hard to grasp (7)
I believe the answer is:
genteel
'refined' is the definition.
(similar in meaning)
'male character that's hard to grasp' is the wordplay.
'male' becomes 'gent' (gent is a kind of male).
'character' becomes 'e'.
'that's hard to grasp' becomes 'el' (I can't explain this - if you can you should believe this answer much more).
'gent'+'e'+'el'='GENTEEL'
Can you help me to learn more?
(Other definitions for genteel that I've seen before include "Exaggeratedly polite" , "Mannerly" , "Artificially polite" , "Refined in taste and manners" , "Affectedly refined and upper-crust" .)